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Here comes a FASHION post. I know, right? “Nia, what are you thinking?! You don’t write about this fluff stuff."
But alas...here I am, with freshly cut hair...writing to you about it.
It’s not what you think though.
About a year and a half ago I wrote a blog about the parallel of my hair to my heart. So I thought, why not do that again and give everyone an update on me.
I’m known as a “long hair girl”...in fact, when I sent my bestie a Marco Polo from the hair salon her reply was......”sounds fun, buuuuut I should be with you because I don’t think I’m allowed to let you cut your hair ever again.”
The Bible says “A woman’s long hair will be her glory”...and I think there’s a lot of truth to that. I don’t think it’s saying that women with short hair have no glory...and I don’t think it’s saying women should have long hair. Also, what was considered long back then? I do, however...see the truth in our hair being our glory. It’s SUCH a part of us.
With that being said, I thought cutting my hair would devastate me.
...that I would feel like I had lost a part of myself.
...that I would question my husband when he says he’s attracted to me.
...that I would just hate styling short hair.
...that I would begin to believe that all the healing my heart had found in the previous blog was gone because THAT hair was gone.
I’ve never been MORE wrong!
Its’ like, suddenly...I’m a short hair girl! After 30 years....with cuts and colors along the way and never REALLY liking short hair on me....I’m a short hair girl? This is the new me!!
I realized that when Sam said “It’s cute, I like it!”...I did wonder if he really meant it, but the insecurity of fretting over it never came out! We’ve matured so much over the last couple of years...and I feel loved by him inside...not based on what’s on the outside. That’s a testament to both of our growth over the years.
Styling this haircut is SO EASY! It takes almost as much time as a side braid would have taken with my long hair, and it looks BETTER than that! My old “easy" hair then was obvious “she didn’t have time today” hair...but the new easy hair? Is just easy.
And believing lies? Didn’t happen!
(anyone else start singing this song after reading that line!?)
Instead as I described my hair to one of the many “SO! How do you like your short hair??” questions...I tried to compare myself to that blog I mentioned earlier and see if my heart feelings matched my hair feelings this time...and IT DID! Here’s how I described my hair to a fellow mom at Symphony’s school. “It’s so much FREER than the long hair! And it’s actually healthy now...all the tangles and deadness is gone! Plus, it’s brighter and I love that!”....and as i said the words freer, healthy, brighter...I realized that for some reason...whether it’s silly or trivial...I find myself identifying my hair with my heart. Not on purpose...it’s like they just match up sometimes.
A lot of you know my story. I am a “survivor” of betrayal in my marriage. By survivor I mean...I didn’t let the betrayal take over my life. I didn’t divorce my husband or get revenge on him. I sought counseling and had every tough conversation you can imagine with him...and God has whole heartedly...1000% redeemed our marriage, our hearts, and our lives. It hasn’t been easy, and every month...every year...I’m changing, growing, learning, stretching and leaning into whatever triggers of heartache may come my way. I’m thankful for obvious reminders through something such as a hairstyle...and I just have to tell you...that although it might look different for you, He wants to redeem your story too. He wants to lay it out in front of you, step by step, hairstyle by hairstyle ...or maybe a little more mysteriously...that he WANTS to heal, He HAS healed, CONTINUES to heal, and won’t stop working on you no matter how busy life gets.
Merry Christmas everyone! You are loved, cherished, and valued.
